Worst Business Plan Ever: New Cross strip club closes

Transpontine brings us the news that the landlord of the White Hart Pub in New Cross is getting out of the strip club game after only a few months of crab-caked fun.

Market forces had the final word and it's now just a pub again.

43 comments:

Monkeyboy said...

So where do I go if I want to stare at women who probably hate me, even though they have fixed grins on their permatanned faces, before going home drunk and waking up with a hangover, an empty wallet and a nagging sense of emptyness?

There's always The Barge I s'pose.

Anonymous said...

Great news! Thanks for letting me know about the campaign 'Stop the strip' a month or so ago.

Anonymous said...

Fantastic news!

Anonymous said...

Ba Humbugs

Anonymous said...

Thanks of course to all the mung bean eaters who shouted this down from the moment they heard about it - they can all now go back to their fairtrade fennel.

Monkeyboy said...

What a load of rubbish...

It failed because it couldn't attract enough men, what stopped you going? Re-runs of beach volley ball and a box of Kleenex? You really should support local businesses or they fail old chap.

Anonymous said...

You're welcome, you sweaty, sex starved loser - you can go back to reading your Sun newspaper and eating your fried chicken now.

4x4 said...

I feel sorry for the young ladies who work there. How else are they going to feed themselves and their habits. Their profession is one of the oldest in the world and they should have every right to ply their trade.
Now I am going to be left w*****g with a face like a gargoyle outside the local mung bean store. How is that good for the local area?

Anonymous said...

"I feel sorry for the young ladies who work there. How else are they going to feed themselves and their habits"

So you feel sorry for them but imply that they work thereto feed a drug habit? Nice. I bet you also buy the myth that when they smile at you, tell you how you're different to the rest and that you are REALLY interesting you actually believe it?

Mind you I suppose that when your only relationship is with a box of tissues any kind of human contact counts as an improvement.

You don't give a shit for the women who work their so stop the crocodile tears.

Ross said...

i live a stones throw away and it made zero impact on my life when it was a pub.

it made zero impact on my life when it was a strip club.

i imagine it will continue to have zero impact on my life when it continues it's life back as a pub.

4x4 said...

I do give a shit, the one of them is my girlfriend. I know how much this will affect her life.
By the way anon-masturbation is a very healthy past time-you should try it. May stop you being dried up and bittter.

Anonymous said...

how will she support her habit?

Anonymous said...

thought you lived in Catford Ross? (if you're that Ross)

Brockley Nick said...

Catford Ross calls himself Fred Vest. Ross is a different Ross.

Anonymous said...

ah, yes, of course, but sometimes Ross does call himself Ross, but I can't check ip's...

Anonymous said...

and he had a similar abrasive(ish) tone

Headhunter said...

What a complete and utter waste of council and court time and money spent getting this application through. The landlord should refund taxpayers money wasted.

Anonymous said...

As should the protestors...

Headhunter said...

Why should the protestors, there would have been no protest if the landlord hadn't made the application to turn the pub into a strip joint for... 3 months...

patrick1971 said...

I thought that this was the only way he could save his business. How odd.

Headhunter said...

Quite. Didn't he say he had tried every other possible alternative in the world and this was simply the only way to make money? Only to fail because he can't have blacked out windows apparently. Didn't do his research very well clearly! And BTW, when will the windows be un-blacked again?

Ross said...

"ah, yes, of course, but sometimes Ross does call himself Ross, but I can't check ip's..."

he usually spells it out all lower case though doesn't he?
i have to say i post less because he has blackened the name, slightly.

Headhunter said...

May be you shuold choose another name. You can be anyone in Blogosphere, you know. You could use the name of another "Friends" character? Perhaps Joey?

Danja said...

Was this a listed building issue?

If it was, I'm going to go and buy myself a smug self-congratulatory pint. Maybe in the Five Bells, though.

Headhunter said...

Transpontine suggests it may have been to do with the blacked out windows, obviously patrons of a strip club and probably the girls themselves don't want people gawking through the enornmous Victorian windows at them, so blacking out the windows is pretty key, the landlord has gone ahead with this only to find out that this is not allowed, apparently

clothed perversions said...

The strippers could wear a burkha, thereby eliminating the window problem, pacifying the protestors and introducing the paying gentlemen to a more bizarre form of teasing than they had anticipated.

I really should copyright that idea, form a religion etc etc

Danja said...

Even more important that the public can't see in, as that's a license condition. It was a nice catch 22 if the listed building angle held and the Council had the balls to follow it through (after losing the license appeal, and after they had potentially confused issues by supervising the works on the licensing side).

Local Letch said...

I remember being in a strip pub in Greenwich some years ago where they did not have totally blacked out window but the traditional frosted glass up to about the height of 2.5m.

This wasn't a proper "gentlemen's club but had strippers on Sunday afternoons I think, with a collection in the traditional pint pot.

Anyway the frosting was OK to protect everyone's blushes except when a double decker bus went by; when the top deck passengers got a free show.

Rather than annoying the girls this seemed to encourage them to come down off the stage and if anything be more daring!

Happy days.......

Anonymous said...

It failed because the girls weren't of a high enough standard. When we went they had a dwarf and some Mum in her 30's with stretch marks, barely worth a pound in the jar. Still the people that wanted it shut down will probs be the first ones to complain when the pub closes and is turns into flats...

fred vest said...

"some Mum in her 30's"

the horror

Anonymous said...

One of them was probably 4x4s girlfriend!

Local Letch said...

the dwarf or the milf?

who's taking odds?

Anonymous said...

You can probably keep the dwarf in a cupboard for those moments when your gf is out and you need (racks brain for dwarf-related-sexual-innuendo)

a quickie...

Tyrwhitt Michael said...

This is begining to sound like a cross between Twin Peaks and the Brockley Barge.........

Is it hailing in Brockley? It is here in the West End. Rather heavily.

Tamsin said...

A tale of frosted windows is the new swimming pool in Gloucester (well, new about 50 years ago). Desiged with a glass frontage looking straight from one of the main roads into Gloucester to the pool area. It was planned that the bottom two panels would be discretely frosted but the whole thing was acutally put in upsidedown. The result, in conjunction with the height of the first wooden glazing bar, was that you looked into people who, if they were male and wearing skimpy trunks, looked as if they were starkers.
However it was such a good advertisement for the pool - seeing people swimming in cool water - that they never changed it.

4x4 said...

No Anon it wasn't my girlfriend my girlfriend-mine is the Dwarf in her teens with the stretch marks-people pay good money to see that sort of thing.
Regulars wll be pleased know that she is still earning an honest crust in a Rub 'n' Tug joint on Vicars Hill.

Anonymous said...

hmmm, can't say as I know of that establishment 4x4...

4x4 said...

Not enough people do Anon-there has been a dearth of such establishments in the local area for too long.
They were running an 'Open Studio'during the art fest and picked up a fair bit of trade. They also cater for the disabled and have wheelchair access which is nice.

Anonymous said...

Their advertising must be very low-key - but then again, I don't go out much at night.

Anonymous said...

Those stip clubs always have frosted windows to add some privacy to their establishments. Perry Jamal frosted window film

fabhat said...

The protests against the White Hart strip club are mentioned in this Times article about feminism:

http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/article6739270.ece

drakefell debaser said...

Intersting article. I couldn't help but notice the advertising all around it though - follow our fashion team, what will you wear next season, the eco diet....fear, consume, fear, consume etc.

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