Brock Pilgrims vs The World

Envy Adams: Short answer: Vegans are just better than everyone else.
- Scott Pilgrim vs The World

Brockley is going up against other bits of London tonight on Location, Location, Location. Time was when this would have been appointment to view TV - they did, after all, invent Brockley in the early noughties.

These days, however, Brockley's star is so ascendant that Kirsty and Phil need us more than we need them and the place is crawling with C4 researchers. Still, let's see which area wins...

20:25 - Brockley is a broad church, but it is probably safe to say that the floppy haired man in red trousers is not about to be shown around SE4 by Kirsty.

20:31 - Browns of Brockley, The Broca, Crofton Park and Upper Brockley Road are what P&K are using too woo them. Woman says she's nervous about trying Brockley vs Limehouse apartment lifestyle. Phil says "cool vibe" here could swing it.

20:33 - the apartment is in the old pub on UBR. Brockley might lose out due to lack of space for a large table FFS.

20:35 - Damning with faint praise - woman says Brockley option probably the sensible bet because it's time to leave London life behind and focus on kids (uh oh).

20:36 - Traitorous cow Kirsty keeps on referring to Brockley as "suburbia" - it wasn't too long ago she was calling this place the buzzy alternative to suburban Hither Green. It's almost as though they have a narrative to crowbar in.

20:36 - Yikes - massive lovely place in Forest Hill is the next option.

20:37 - Bloody fireplaces. People are obsessed with them. Fireplace = character. Never quite understood that. Anyway, the Forest Hill flat looks like the leading bet as an alternative to docklands. Brockley let down by soulless pub conversion (not for the first time!).

20:47 - girlieman says that Forest Hill would be too much of a lifestyle change for him - the fast pace of life in an anodyne housing development in Docklands is a lot to give up, clearly. Phil says go South East. That is why Phil is a highly-paid celebrity expert.

20:50 - Meanwhile, in Pimlico, the other couple are still reeling from the discovery that you get more for your money in an ex-Council property.

20:52 - Forest Hill wins! In your face, north London. Brockley wins by extension. If we'd served up better fireplaces, that could have been our win.

20:56 - Is this a first for LLL? A couple actually buy the house they choose? The happy couple move to Forest Hill.

15 comments:

Robert said...

"the fast pace of life in an anodyne housing development in Docklands is a lot to give up, clearly".

Haha. The ability to pump iron whilst people gawp at you through full length windows from the DLR is not an experience available to Brockley Residents. I can understand his dilemma.

Monkeyboy said...

Awkward man hug there....

Andy said...

They were both thinking of the future.  She was thinking of a family and enough living space, he was thinking of a mid-life crisis and a mid-late 30s bachelor pad as an aid de pulling.

Buta_gaijin said...

I was vaguely irked by kirsty's labelling of brockley as suburbia too... I've heard a few people say that brockley is suburban and I never quite get it... It's zone 2 not somewhere out in the sticks.... What makes brockley suburban over limehouse which is also zone 2?

Robert said...

To be fair - Brockley as was built from the 1860's as a middle-class suburb on farmland. Limehouse has been populated since the Georgian period, largely to serve the docks in East London.

Was she being historically accurate, or just derogatory? - I didn't watch the programme.

Knjibrey said...

I think it just fits in with the traditional media narrative of south-east London being "no-man's land" where everything fun in life goes to die.

headhunter said...

I suppose so but the geography of London has changed since Georgian and Victorian times, brockley isn't a new development on the outskirts anymore

Flightrider said...

Limehouse? She was nervous about giving up Limehouse? What the hell is there to do in Limehouse anyway? Jeez.

Headhunter said...

Why can't I alter the name I'm posting under.... Arrgh!

Headhunter said...

Finally...sorry, trying to get used to this system..... It seems that you have to provide an email address and that the new posting system will only let me post using the first part of the email address... Is there any way to change my posting name without having to make up a fictitious email address using 'headhunter'

anonymous said...

Fireplaces are the future. Central heating is so 1980s.

Kate Gould said...

I loved the bit Phil said Forest Hill was "up and coming" - he said that years ago when he brought two girls there to look at a flat which they then bought! He's clearly never been back to see how things have changed and improved in the interim. And he persuaded a chap to buy a flat in Upper Brockley Road a few years ago as an "investment" to rent out while he bought a massive pad down by the sea in Kent... I'm sure Phil said at the time that Brockley was "up and coming" then too.

Aricana said...

i was having some work done to my flat the day they filmed that episode and they asked if we could pause for a bit while they filmed outside. Seems like a long time ago now. 

Anon said...

Fireplaces are nice because they are a sign that original features have been kept. Original features are characterful because they show the building has some history. 

Brockley Nick said...

Ah. I see.

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