How to get a conehead in advertising

You want to run an outdoor display advertising company. You have two main options available.

You could negotiate with a Council or a land owner for the rights to sell ad space on their property, sharing the proceeds of the advertising you sell and operating in a regulated manner, so that ads are not too obtrusive. Or you could buy an old car, paint it with the logos of some rubbish company that is silly enough to advertise with you and park that car on the street by a station, taking up a useful space and not making any contribution to stretched public coffers.

If you choose the latter option, then you need to be prepared for people to come and put cones on your car, to highlight what an antisocial person you are and to expose the fact that the car is nothing but a billboard. These cones have been here for some time...

21 comments:

Monkeyboy said...

I've been playing #conewatch with @nyloncube for some time. The latest eruption will be hard to top.

Kennorton101 said...

 Christ I Love Brockley
 

TheOnlyLivingBoy said...

I walked past that a few days back. It did make me laugh! 

Monkeyboy said...

Mind you, there was a stark beauty about the single cone on the sunroof. This is much more Damien Hirst like.

BarCar said...

There's another one parked/abandoned on Stondon Park - opposite the junction with Holmesley Road. Contacted the council and they said "tough". If the cone fairies could pay it a visit... or maybe a Christo-style wrapping would be a more effective protest.

MalpasSimon said...

I don't think the council will do anything unless a) it appears to be in an un-roadworthy condition, or b) it's not displaying any tax. I once had the tax disc stolen out of my car, it probably took them about 10 seconds...

The_Local_Crackhead said...

Bloody classic!!!

Tom said...

Tricerastegasaurus

boris johnston said...

Wouldnt it be a shame if someone did smash the side window and remove the tax disk. This was the only way a nuisance parker on Shardeloes was removed a few years back. Council would'nt do a thing apart from helpfully suggesting that they couldnt do much until the tax disk expired or 'was removed'.

Anonymous said...

What constitutes a nuisance parker? Someone the local knitted jumper brigade takes exception to?

Warren2warren said...

That cars has been parked there for over 3 months now...

Car owner said...

Right, and? Ratepayers who are fully taxed can expect to park as long as any local restrictions allow them to.

Monkeyboy said...

It's not "rate payer" it's not a car that has any intention of being used as a car. It's an old banger with a tax disk that someone is using as an advertising billboard, so denying good honest car owners who may need a parking space. Cars are designed to move otherwise they are an obstruction, much like a skip.

See?

The Real Welcome said...

Hi Car Owner, just let me know your address and I will buy three old bangers and stick them in front of your house indefinitely. Three cars = £50 each + 3 tax discs. A year of schadenfreude. Well worth it.

Anonymous said...

Is that car outside Broca a skip then?

The Real Welcome said...

No, it's a figment of your imagination. Now what's your address, Car Lover?

Anonymous said...

Have you not seen the car I'm talking about then? Does it get special treatment if it's on the politburo's list?

The Real Welcome said...

No, I haven't. I walk past there every day and there is no other car that has been there, not moving for months. And even if there was - if it was being used by someone who lived or worked on Coulgate Street, that would be OK. 

I know you can tell the difference. Even you. The bloke who uses the word politburo all the time.

Manor Club said...

Talking of skips I noticed today that the container outside Meze Mangal has disappeared. Was this old news that I was the last to notice? Does this mean they will finally expand into the next door unit?

CKSE4. said...

Today in the snow there is 'move this car' written!

graygeez said...

Wht doesn't somebody try the less militant route and inform the company who are advertising of the huge negative local feeling (maybe wait until the -ve comments here have reached that level before calling).

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