Coprophobia

BC regular Tyrwhitt Michael has been the victim of over-zealous dog-poo stencillers and has been in touch with the Council to understand why anyone thinks festooning our streets with pictures of crapping canines is a good idea.

The Council reply suggests that the implementation of this policy has strayed far from the original intention. Here's where the Council say the stencils should be sprayed:

"The graffiti team are instructed to apply stencils in areas that are not directly intrusive to individual properties, i.e. corners of the affected street or at locations in-between properties, next to lampposts and pillar boxes. They have been instructed not to apply stencils directly outside the gates of properties."

In fact, they are being sprayed every few metres on many roads, directly outside people's front gates.

The Council's guidelines make far more sense than the blanket bombing of bowwow bowel movements that our pavements are currently subjected to.

As for their efficacy, the Council offers this supporting data:

"Although we do not have any current data, we did see a drop in dog fouling following their introduction 9 years ago. This year we will be monitoring the levels of dog fouling in order that we can assess the effectiveness of the Dog Control Orders when they come into force."

Which is hardly convincing, given how unpleasant the "solution" is. If they can be proven to work, we'd give them our grudging support, with one crucial caveat - by all means keep the squatting dog and the "bag it, bin it" slogan, but please lose the turd.