Pavement fouling

Our one, vivid recollection of school French classes is the text books. They used "Deirdre's Photo Casebook"-style comic strips to tell stories. Only instead of "Le singe est dans l'arbre", they would be stories about young people going shopping. And instead of turning this material in to well-loved stand-up routines, kids in our school would mine comedy from them by drawing little poos coming out of every orifice in the photos. And often, penises going in to every orifice.

We found it quite nauseating. Which is perhaps why we had so few friends at secondary school.

Walking home from St John's station one night recently, we had a traumatic flashback to those French lessons. It was caused by this picture on the pavement (sorry about the quality):


We then realised that when the Council offered to run a "responsible dog day" in Brockley Cross, this is what they had in mind. Spray painting pictures of dogs taking a dump on our pavements.

Like the artists who defaced our old text books, the person who created this stencil clearly did so with some relish. The steam rising from the turd is a particularly delightful touch. Just in case the message was too subtle without them.

Well at the risk of seeming to you as twee and po-faced as we did to our former classmates, we'd like to say: please don't try and solve a problem by creating another one. Please don't debase the public realm to tackle a small minority of anti-social people who will ignore your signs anyway. Just prosecute those people who let their dogs crap in the street.

This is another attack of the BIG YELLOW SIGNS, with added stink lines.

58 comments:

Armpit Vale said...

There's one on catford bridge also. Replacing a biodegradable, organic poo with a permanent one seems like a strange move in my eyes. I'd rather step in dog's logs if it meant it would go eventually.

The Cat Man said...

Theres one outside the Mantle Road Shops/end of Revelon Road.

Wheres the NIMBY brigade when you need them?

Vikki said...

Miseries! I'm loving the steam!

And if you were walking back from St John's station you can't have failed to miss the two huge piles of poop that have been there during the past few weeks. Someone living around there must own a great dane or st bernard...

I'd choose the yellow picture anyday.

Yoda said...

Very nasty is this.

Tyrwhitt Michael said...

There are half a dozen or so of these stencils in Manor Avenue ruining an otherwise pleasant street scape.

We seem to have avoided them in Tyrwhitt Road so far, although not I'm afraid the real thing.

About 5 years ago the problem of fouling seemed to have disappeared any ideas why it seems to have returned?

I suppose we have to blame the owners.

Headhunter said...

I think there's one just by the junction of Ashby Rd and Manor Ave. I hadn't really thought much about it before. Went to Amsterdam earlier this year and they had some even more graphic ones if I remember rightly!

The Cat Man said...

But is it art?

Anonymous said...

Experiencing a 'traumatic flashback' because of a yellow stencil of a dog on the pavement?

If these are going someway to decreasing the dog fouling problem then I'm all in favour. The majority people problably don't really give them much thought. It seems people will comment now as the issue has been brought up.

People blogging here offer a minority opinion of such trivialities as the yellow dog stencils, whereas the majority of those living in Brockley are probably not that traumatised by them.

Armpit Vale said...

But then the majority also aren't traumatised by betting shops, non-GM coffee, fried chicken, etc...

Anonymous said...

That poo looks like a syrup sponge pudding. Why couldn't they have gone for the traditional "Mr Whippy's Brown Sloppy" design?

patrick1971 said...

I hate to be the voice of doom, but dog mess was discussed in great depth at the Crofton Park local assembly the other week. The councillor spearheading the dog mess initiative (those words were used) did think that these signs were the strongest weapon in the council's armoury...

osh said...

Anon, how do you know what the majority think?

Why is this issue trivial? It's part of all our daily lives.

It would be good to see some evidence that this approach works and works better than other methods, which don't involve graffiti.

My guess is it doesn't.

osh said...

Anon, how do you know what the majority think?

Why is this issue trivial? It's part of all our daily lives.

It would be good to see some evidence that this approach works and works better than other methods, which don't involve graffiti.

My guess is it doesn't.

Tamsin said...

Where have you been that side of the tracks? These stencils (and to a certain extent the real thing) have been a feature of Telegraph Hill for ages.
What we used to have and should see if the council would be prepared to run again is the Pooper Scooter. A chap on a motorbike who in respose to a report would come and hoover up the dog turd with one part of his mobile cleaning eqipment and then spray the area with some disinfectant. Effective and reassuring.
On the matter of pavement art. Even longer ago there were yellow bunnies on some slabs. Very engaging, although regrettably I encouranged my children to jump on them on the way to pre-school (gave interest to the journey - along with the "wobble stone").

patrick1971 said...

Hear hear for the return of the pooper scooper. I'm sure there are lots of now-unemployed investment bankers who would be ideal for the role!

Anonymous said...

Part of all our daily lives?

What? Dogshit?

Headhunter said...

I'll take that job....

osh said...

Pavements!

The things we walk on.

Anonymous said...

Ah alright, fair enough. I thought we'd reached levels of fever pitch exaggeration last seen when someone said "make sure Speedicars sign is at the TOP of the agenda"...

Yes I agree they are a bit silly to have on the pavements we all use.

Anonymous said...

Yawn ...

Paul said...

I for one hugely enjoyed drawing poo and penises in school books. Some of my fondest memories are of crudely (in many ways)drawn diagrams in the Latin textbook we studied. I only wish the yellow stencils showed a fraction of my creativity. A little miffed I wasn't on the design comittee, truth be told.

b. said...

always interests me how 'anons' will step in with brave and sweeping statements about the people who post on this website and the little importance or value any of our opinions have and yet don't register. anon comments are as good as no comment and we all know that people that don't comment have no right to an opinion.

in my, important, opinion i actually dont mind the yellow pictures, got one in comerford road and havent seen a shit on it yet. although there was one on my god dam door step last week.

solution - anon commenters and people who let their dogs shit on the pavement should be taken out and shot.

i have a feeling this may get censored.

Alex said...

I had seen a few of these around Brockley/Crofton Park ages ago but then a couple of weeks ago loads appeared.

To be honest I don't mind if it has a good effect. There was a great big pile of the stuff outside my house the other week and now I have 4 of these stencils on my road (possibly a bit much).

jpm said...

It's amazing. Why not also paint the 'they want your pod' and 'neighborhood watch area' on the pavements. It can be like the Hollywood walk of fame. Or is that defame? Bonkers.

Anonymous said...

This blog is considerably weaker without the anons. To suggest otherwise is deluded.

Anonymous said...

I think we should introduce a policy of not responding to anyone that posts 'anonymous'.

Anonymous said...

i agree.

Anonymous said...

but I've go an opinon too

Anonymous said...

So have I!

Anonymous said...

And me!

Anonymous said...

And... ad infinitum.

Anonymous said...

Surely he meant 'deface'?

13:24 said...

Or defaece.

Anonymous said...

I much rather step on the sign than on the real thing...

Obertra said...

Dog owners are a minority of the 'non-dog owning community of any council taxable conurbation'. FACT! How come 'the dog owning minority' have so much access to the majority non-dog owning community tax payers majority green space wot is paid for by the majority non-dog owning majority via their council tax? Seems to me as a majority non-dog owning council tax payer ‘my green space’ appropriated so much by minority dog owners SHOULD BE ABSOLUTELY DOGGONE FREE OF DOG OWNING MINORITY DOG PERSONS!!! MEOWWWWW!

Obertra said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Obertra said...

Correction to previous post which was un-clickable.

Therefore:
copy and paste link below:

http://www.zimbio.com/Lewisham/articles/141

neanderthal d said...

Stop moaning about the yellow dog crap stencils.

Stencils are art - I gather that Banksy has been going round the borough doing those yellow dog crap stencils.

So, no ripping up paving slabs to sell them on eBay, please.

Anonymous said...

oh, in that case long may they continue. Is the paint organic?

Headhunter said...

No but the crap is...

drakefell debaser said...

Obertra, interesting link. I can’t help but feel that the counter proposal to the Lewisham Dog order is a little draconian if not utterly insane. I take it the proposal to have every dog registered, licensed, chipped and DNA profiled is so that people with too much time on their hands can match the crap to the hound? Cemetery Shit Investigation Brockley?

Jt said...

I'm going to give the council a break on this one.

There's an issue with dog fouling, they've come up with a response, it's not to everyone's tastes, however no alternatives are forthcoming.

The image is funny. No point in getting steamed up about it!

toshy said...

Speaking of huge piles of poop near St Johns station... that was a pretty sight this morning. Wonder how many people trod in that on the way home in the dark last night?

b. said...

even funnier when anons care. since they dont have a right to an opinion they certainly dont have the right to care.

lb said...

Interesting that you feel that anonymous commenters have forfeited their right to an opinion, even if in the vast majority of cases it's more edifying than your own.

lb said...

As for the signs, I have to say I barely notice them. They're certainly no worse as street-adornment than any of the tedious bits of remedial-class trompe l'oeil done by Banksy, or Tarquin, or whatever his name turned out to be.

Look closely, thugh, and it does look a bit like the signs are advocating impaling dogs through the neck with a pointed stick.

Obertra said...

Drakefell Debaser said (6 posts above in response to Obertra's ‘dog solution’)

"...proposal to the Lewisham Dog order is a little draconian if not utterly insane..."

How come when 'ID data bases with DNA, etc.' are up and running. E.g. the USA is strict with fingerprinting for holiday makers entering the US. The UK right now is pushing forward ID cards with all the digital detail that 'invasively involves'. Surely, what’s good enough for all Brit homo sapiens is good enough for the canine owner who allows its mutt(s) free rein in “No Dog” areas?

MEOWWWWWWW!

brockley mutha said...

i am surprised you've only just noticed them. We've had them on breakspears for years. My children adore them. They also rather liked the 'THEY WANT YOUR POD' signs.

drakefell debaser said...

Obertra, extending DNA date bases to include domestic pets would be a little silly. The cost for one is not worth it given the average dog lives for say 10 years. Are we then to include cats, parrots, snakes and the other exotic pets people have? It would be discriminatory towards dogs not to, which would surely be against your 'liberal' stand point. DNA data bases, from what i understand, are collected mainly by the police, so apart from the odd turd, dogs are not usually guilty of much.

Woof.

Anonymous said...

There is one right outside our house in Geoffrey Road - I am afraid that although we do not have a dog, it labels us as 'crap magnets' Only good thing is that my five year old has learnt that defecate is a more polite term than the discription he had used for what the yellow dog was doing.

On the subject of Geoffrey Road has anyone had any post for the last few days?

Anonymous said...

Better watch out there 'anonymous' - there can't be that many yellow dog signs outside houses in Geoffrey road.

Anonymous said...

There's a street called Geoffrey Road? Reminds me of Rainbow.

Obertra said...

Drakefell...you debase (ha! ha!) your accusation that I propose that Jerry Gerbil, Peter Rabbit, Jiminy Cricket, Jemimer Puddle Duck, Snoopy the Snake and all other of Lewisham’s pet menagerie be ‘debased’. Unlike poorly owned urban mutts and pooches I have not been aware, as a frequenter of Lewisham’s green walks, ginormous deposits dumped on pavements and paths by such as Geraldine the Gold Fish!

Meowwwwwwwww!

Obertra said...

With the consideration of pavement dog poop stencils and other dirty-dog signage there’s likely to be much more of “..it” dumped ‘off road’ in Lewisham’s green and pleasant land. –

You only have to read between the lines the new 'LEWISHAM DOG CONTROL ORDERS' and you will realise a dog has carte blanche to cock-n-squat where it will without much fear of ‘the dog police’ will collar him.

And another thing - Lewisham’s political party's, as far as I am aware, haven’t stated their individual position re dog control orders which propose to open up more of Lewisham's green spaces which, hitherto, had longstanding "no dog" bylaws attached to them for very good purpose. –

As a founder member of Friends of Brockley & Ladywell Cemeteries (FoBLC) we are fully aware the twinned cemeteries of Ladywell Brockley have had a "no dog" bylaw in place for decades, presumably, 'instituted at the laying of the first interment c.1850's when the cemeteries were first sanctified. –

All of a sudden (2008) Lewisham new dog control orders proposes to scrap the 'no dog bylaw' for these grade 1 listed cemeteries to allow dog access without let or hindrance to these additionally ‘certified wildlife sanctuaries'. This is most alarming given that dog ownership in the borough is a minority. How is it a minority are able to 'persuade Lewisham Council' to allow/impose their private ownership of a dog upon even more public green space than they already have free access to?
On the contrary, given poor care of dogs nationally and locally with cruelty, abandonment, 'questionable breeding' re Crufts/Kennel Club, etc., 'vicious dog ownership' in the community leading to attacks and injury by dogs in private and in public places Councils should be considering the curtailing dog ownership in Lewisham in all ways possible. –

Instead of opening up more green space to the minority private dog owner Lewisham Council should be encouraging fewer dogs in the borough re ownership and access to public green spaces so that majority public non-dog owners may enjoy ‘Lewisham’s green spaces’ without imposition from minority private dog owners.

Tressillian James said...

Encouraging fewer dog owners? C'mon on - owning dogs is proven as godd for your mental and physical health. Getting oout there three times a day to have a walk with your pooch.

The VAST majority of dog owners are responsible and pick up after their dogs - certainly in the street - and also in the pacrk - ask the chap who empties the 'dog bins' in Hilly Fields every day.

Dogs need to run around and there should be no issue in them doin that in the park - again the VASt majority of woners have dogs that they can control and come when called.

As to the dogs in the cemetery - I agree with you - it should not be allowed - they are places of rest for the departed - and not a defacto park for walking our dogs.

I think though your point would sound much more reasonable if you didn't combine it with comeents about " without imposition from minority private dog owners.". I think you'll find that dog owners are consulted less by the counicl than the Friends of Brockley Cemetery. I would also suggest that, although a minority, dog owners are also tax payers, who deserve services and amenities from the council - the same as any other minority.

b. said...

touche lb. touche. pavement fouling is something i feel quite strongly about, so having my opinion on the matter described as less 'edifying' will certainly make me rethink my stance on anon posters.

on the other hand, it does seem our opinions on the matter of the yellow signs are fairly similar, although, yours definitely edifies more.

Obertra said...

I wish there was a 'photo input' facility on this blog. I could upload untold 'nasty dog doings pics' done by dog owner's dogs dumped here there and everywhere even on graves and by graves in Brockley & Ladywell Cemeteries.

Recently I pointed out to a local Brockley woman with her Jack Russells about five dumps all in close proximity on graves. I wasn't necessarily accusing her; but; the torrential, foul mouthed abuse I suffered was horrible. I immediately reported her to Lewisham police station. Much good that did to get 'dog patrols' into a "No Dog" cemetery where locals arrogantly run and rampage their dogs daily. -

Talking of rampaging dogs - a local dog guy unleashes his retrievers everyday in the cemeteries to chase about well beyond his reach where the dogs scrabble and dig at graves unhindered at innocent wildlife in a place 'grade 1 listed' as a 'designated reserve'.

I dread the result that Lewisham Council may announce soon where Lewisham Cemeteries are proposed to be opened up fully to dog walkers. -

If the worse happens - as a wildlife archivist - I will be driven from a certain Lewisham oassis never to return!

Will said...

"There is one right outside our house in Geoffrey Road - I am afraid that although we do not have a dog, it labels us as 'crap magnets' Only good thing is that my five year old has learnt that defecate is a more polite term than the discription he had used for what the yellow dog was doing.

On the subject of Geoffrey Road has anyone had any post for the last few days?"

Hello upstairs from me downstairs! :) (I have used my poirot-like detective skills to work out this is also my house being described)

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