Tickleme down with a feather

It's open! By God it's open. The Brigadoon of Brockley Cross is serving jerk bagels. In case we have to wait another hundred years before it opens, we have composd a haiku to describe what we saw this day:

A counter with food.
A breakfast-bar arrangement.
Customers buying.

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

Customer goes in
"Sir, are your mung beans fair trade?"
Bemused man looks on.

Brockley Nick said...

Very good! But please give yourself a name.

Anonymous said...

Excellent. Well done.
Haiku are hard to compose
With such a quick response.

Anonymous said...

Indeed, sir, they are
Would you like fried chicken too?
The blossoms fall gently

Bea said...

OK - last one on blossoms was me ... didn't want to identify with my pathetic attempt at poetry.

M said...

Fried chicken for lunch
Tracksuit clad lard arse wipes mouth
Cigarette for pud

Tamsin said...

OK, and the second one was me. Just having begun to say, from the recollection of a previously totally failed attempt, that they were hard to write I found I was nearly there. And then did not want to seem to be be blowing my own trumpet.

Anonymous said...

Well done M - just lost half of my drink reading that

Speedicars new sign
Looks the same as the old one
BrocSoc wolves called off

M said...

Pumping stereo
Worth three times what the car cost
My windows rattle

The Cat Man said...

all very good!

Anonymous said...

Underground comes soon
Brockley house prices go up
Not In My Back Yard

brockley rocks said...

a propos new shops opening, I still think there's a massive need for a good value beautician - why doesn't one of the hdressers do nails, eyebrows etc?

Anonymous said...

Haven't you been to Ladywell?

Tamsin said...

On the matter of Haiku, whether or not the intro is true these are rather nice.

"In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. Haiku poetry has strict construction rules - each poem has only 17 syllables and three lines; 5 syllables in the first, 7 in the second, 5 in the third.

They are used to communicate a timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity. Here are actual error messages from Japan."



The Web site you seek
Cannot be located, but
Countless more exist.
--------------------------------------------
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
--------------------------------------------
Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.
--------------------------------------------
Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
--------------------------------------------
Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.
--------------------------------------------
Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
-------------------------------------------
Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.
--------------------------------------------
A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.
--------------------------------------------
Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.
--------------------------------------------
You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.
-------------------------------------------
Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.
------------------------------------------
Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.
-------------------------------------------
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

angelofthewest said...

photos! please post some.....

Tressillian James said...

Ah but Bea - you did it corrctly - a haiku must always have an identifer to the season in it

Tressillian James said...

The spring breeze gently
Carries aroma of jerk
Chicken. Drooling dog.

Cllr Dean Walton said...

brockley assembly
today at the church please come
you are most welcome

apols off topic
but opportunity great
would be good to meet

starting at two prompt
talk about improving brockley
bring your ideas today

Anonymous said...

But which church is it?
Lacking important info
You must try harder

Cllr Dean Walton said...

st andrews at two
where wickham, brockley roads meet
see you there later

Cllr Dean Walton said...

finished prompt at four
more women than men for a change
good positive vibe

betamatt said...

On the subject of fast food (and as I know there are a lot of fried chicken fans on this blog!) - an interesting article on the man who designs most of the faux KFC shop signs:
http://www.creativereview.co.uk/crblog/meet-mr-chicken/

Headhunter said...

Who'd've thought there was a whole support industry specialising in fried chicken signs!

drakefell debaser said...

“Some of the areas are so saturated with chicken shops, y’know what I mean? I blame the council to be honest to a certain extent, for letting a shop be within in a certain y’know. I feel sorry for some of them, when I put up a sign here today for somebody and then next week somebody wants me to put up another sign virtually next door. They’re going to struggle to make ends meet.”

Mr Cassanova’s signs may be lacking in elegance but at least he has good business sense. Lewisham BC, take note please.

Blake said...

sorry to break up this haiku orgy, but I went there, and had a jerk chicken bagel wi/cheese and coleslaw. AWESOME.

The Cat Man said...

Jerk Chicken, Cheese and Coleslaw? Yuck. Why not have jerk chicken OR cheese and coleslaw?

I hate these modern times, especially crass cultural fusions like this.

Monkeyboy said...

Crass cultural fusion? I'd question Blake's pallet but not entirely sure why you object on cultural lines?


...actually I can guess.

Monkeyboy said...

About to have a cup of tea with a scone/clotted cream/jam....Mmmmmm

hang on!! the jam is french!! and the tea is indian!! Although we used to own india and do have a bit of french knocking around our aristocracy so I think we can cope with the fusion. And a scone with clotted cream could never be crass even with foreign jam.

Am I not taking his argument seriously? discuss...

Blake said...

crass cultural fusions? what? Jerk chicken is eaten with coleslaw normally. They offer chutney as well. The cheese came as standard.

Tressillian James said...

Blake - glad someone's tried it out - I'll be down there to get my lunch tomorrow. Jerk Chicken and Coleslaw sounds great (I'll skip the cheese). What's the pricing like?

Blake said...

ha ha. The cheese worked, i swear! They melt it under the grill. It was two fifty for a bagel, fiver for meat and rice.

BrockleyBiker said...

"...actually I can guess."


"Bloody Jerk chicken, coming over here,shacking up with our coleslaw..."

Tressillian James said...

coleslaw being an eastern eurpoean import, maybe it was the cheese he was trying to protect. Let's hope they didn't use Brie..

Brockley Nick said...

There are few foods that can't be improved with a dollop of coleslaw in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

Chocolate?

Tressillian James said...

Just has a rather nice Chicken Curry from Tickle Me. A little bit boney (ie. bone to meat ratio not good) but flavour was all there.

Hugh said...

Meat, quite good. Bones, not good.

Monkeyboy said...

I've lived in Brockley for 5 years now, previously I lived in Greenwich. I've never had a 'jerk' anything before. I was wondering around Deptford Market (bought a pudding bowl and a loaf tin for £3) and had a random dish from one of the street stalls. Jerk pork with Rice & peas, it passes the Monkeyboy taste test. It was pork belly slices with the jerk seasoning and a hot sauce and was delish.

So any fellow white boys, give it a try.

Anonymous said...

Here's a tip: try the Stewed Beef from Nu-Spice on Coulgate St.

After years of only ordering the jerk chicken (which is also wonderful), I branched out and what a discovery it was! The beef is incredibly tender with delicious rich, slightly hot sauce.

Mezzer

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