Oh. Jesus.

Blake: You see this watch? You see this watch?
Dave Moss: Yeah.
Blake: That watch costs more than your car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave.
- Glengarry Glen Ross

There's a new church in Brockley and this one's sure to solve all your problems and turn you in to one of life's winners.

St Cyprian's Hall turns out not to have been bought to convert to residential use, but to house the Redeemed Christian Church of God, which is great news, because these guys "heal the sick free of charge." Not only that, but it turns out that:

As we moved into the Year, 2009, our great Father will watch over you, support you and enrich your life with Joy Unspeakable . Your time of promotion has come. The Lord from whom promotion comes will give you wisdom to work with your Divine Partner that will result into Joy Unspeakable for you and your family.

This particular church was described by the New York Times as "one of [Africa's] most vigorously expansionary religious movements, a homegrown Pentecostal denomination that is crusading to become a global faith." This vigorous expansion has obviously helped them outgrow their home on Thurston Road, Lewisham. Brockley is the logical base for any movement hoping to conquer the world, as Brockley Central has proven.

Thanks to Fintan for the shot.