Do you smell what the Rock is cooking?

Wyclef: Yo Rock I sold like seventeen million records
The Rock: It doesn't matter how many records you've sold!
Wyclef: Alright I'm with you, yo check it out, you wanna go get diamond rings?
The Rock: It doesn't matter if the Rock wants to go get diamond rings or not!
- It doesn't matter, Wyclef Jean

Brockley's Rock, the new fish and chip restaurant on Brockley Road, has found a way to appeal to all of Brockley's tribes.

We were in there on Friday night and as we sat and worked our way through two enormous fishcakes (they eventually gave us a doggy bag for the second) we were struck by the fact that of all of Brockley's cafes, the Rock appeals to the widest cross-section of the community. Black and white, young and old, gay and straight, families and singletons, achingly cool and painfully uncool. All of Brockley life passed through their doors in the space of about half an hour.

Perhaps it's because fish and chips are still the great British leveler, but Brockley's Rock shows that the presence of brushed aluminium and a commitment to quality don't have to be elitist.

40 comments:

bertie wooster said...

How do you tell the difference between gay and straight?

Brockley Nick said...

Since you ask, there was a lesbian couple there, waiting for their chips.

Brockley Nick said...

And I am straight, so I had that base covered too

rah rah said...

The same applies to costcutters.

Radclyffe Hall said...

How do you know they were lesbian? Did they have bags full of cucumbers or something?

Bernard Manning said...

You beat me to it

aidan said...

Very few veggies though.

Brockley Nick said...

Blow me, you can tell two women are a couple in much the same way you can tell if a man and a woman are a couple. They were hugging and kissing one another, OK?!

@Rah - yes, but general stores are different - you pretty much have to go in them to get a pint of milk or a loaf of bread, so they will always be universalist.

Brockley Nick said...

Aidan - my wife's veggie and found enough on the menu.

aidan said...

Yeah, there's loads of chips...

Brockley Nick said...

Basically, yes. And mushy peas. What more does anyone need?!

rah rah said...

A fish n chip shop is about as universalist as you can get. It's like a saying a nicely decorated post office is used by everyone in the community, it's not really a surprise. So I don't really get the point. But it's great that the BROCK is being well used.

Dan said...

so they cater for northerns too?

Not tried it yet. Mrs on a diet. I see they do grilled fish so will check it out

Brockley Nick said...

@Rah - go to Tony's fish and chips (which I also like) in Brockley Cross and spot the difference. You will not see all of Brockley there. Just the more sallow-faced portion.

Anonymous said...

I've seen all sorts in Tony's, Fishy Business and Top Chef (still without review).

marmite said...

"They were hugging and kissing one another"

a use of tongues would be a little more conclusive

Osh said...

It's true that it's a more diverse crowd. I like places like Toads Mouth and Brockley Mess but they are basically pretty middle class hangouts. Brockley's Rock is one place where you can sit down and the people next to you are likely to be completely different. They're doing well. Like the article says, nice but not posh.

Smiles is probably pretty close too.

coco chanel said...

in defence of Nick – and his gross generalisations could do with a bit of support here (they don't always need it) – but I remember some time ago Nick posted a small video of himself pontificating on something meaningless as part of his chosen occupation - and I could have sworn that he looked like a homosexual.

How wrong can one be.

Anonymous said...

....and painfully uncool.

FINALLY, a place I can feel at home in.

clone ranger said...

"the people next to you are likely to be completely different"

i think that will be the case in every possible circumstance

Can of worms said...

Generalisations? to make a point. Well I never. How very dare you.

Anonymous said...

Top Chef... well depends if you're going to force nick to try something he has no interest in. Do a review, post it on SEC or in the "suggest a topic" section. It's a free blog, but your gut where your mouth is.

"they served fried eggs and OK bacon on a plate. It didn't kill me..."

Brockley Nick said...

Haha Can of Worms, you're still hanging around to catch me out to prove that my use of generalisations is as bad as your "all middle class people are selfish scumbags" effort.

Nice try.

A) I was being specific, not general
B) I was being nice, not rude

In both cases, the opposite of you.

Do try again soon.

Carys said...

I wish there were more vegetarian options on the menu though - the choice is very limited.

Things like deep fried halloumi or vegetarian sausages wouldn't go amiss. The closest I could see to a 'fish' replacement was the veggie spring roll.

Anonymous said...

Cheese and onion or vegetable pie/pastie wouldn't go amiss.

make mine a savaloy said...

lesbian pastie

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with Tony's Plaice? It's got a much more flexible menu that Brockleys Rock (as enjoyable as it is) for veggies. When I was in there Saturday night you couldn't have had a wider variety of people then also.

Brockleys Rock seemed more of a cafe/up-market fish and chips than standard greasy chippy with plenty getting them to go, which is more what I'm after when I want a chippy to be honest.

Millitant Meat Eater. said...

vegetarian sausage....thats like creating a meat apple. Stick to yer own food shapes!

Anonymous said...

Places like Livebait take the fish and chip shop upmarket.

http://www.livebaitrestaurants.co.uk/

Brockleys Rock is not like that at all, it reminds me very much of a typical northern chippy. Right down to the blaring radio in the background.

It has a few 'specials', for the adventurous, but nothing that would distract those looking for a regular fish and chip supper.

We are fortunate that we have this chip shop and others, where the quality is good. This in a city where fish and chip shops are heavily outnumbered by a huge number of mediocre fried chicken takeaways. Variety of choice is good thing.

Now, if Brockley had a decent pie and mash shop.....

Carys said...

@Anonymous 16.14

Out of curiosity, what veggie options are there are Tony's Plaice? BR is 3 minutes away for me and TP is more like 12, but for the right food I'll go the extra (quarter) mile.

cheesy said...

ooh yes, if it had halloumi I'd be there all the time... it is pretty limited vegi-wise

Fishy Business Rocks said...

Err...I tried out Brockley's Rock and to be honest it was really average apart from the portions being too small.
Not nearly as good as Fishy Business who give you LOADS of fresh stuff.

(and the name is better too...)

quick brown fox said...

I ended up in Fishy Business on my way home after a night out, simply because it seemed to be the only place that was open. I thought the chips were really disappointing - greasy and soggy.

Good for Brockley's Rock; they seem to be doing a good job. It's hard to please everyone, as this blog proves every day....

Bass hunter said...

Tried the Brockley's Rock new mackerel bap at the weekend, it was delicious and a bargain £1.40 on an introductory offer. Found that one portion of chips was more than enough between two. In all a great plaice.

Desperate Dan said...

Sod all this poncy fish talk - sometimes wot you need is a guilty meat pie,chips 'n' gravy! So can any one tell me if the stake 'n' ale pies are any good, i.e., a step up from the normal ' Pukka' chippy fare?

I guess as it's only around the corner I could find out myself, but being a lazy git...

Dan said...

Maybe an inappropriate plug . . .try the pies in Hardy's Pub / Green Pea (greenwich) *Ouch*

They are superb

Anonymous said...

Yep,for all the Chinese, Indian,West Indian and Italian restaurants you cant beat a bit of the old fish & chips.

Anonymous said...

So where is best? Fishy Business or Brockly Rock?

Anonymous said...

You can have a sit down fish supper with table service at Brockleys Rock, where as Fishy business there is not enough room to swing a cat and the service is often very slow.

However, for me, the quality of the chips is a good guide and in that department Brockley Rock is a clear winner. Moreover, the fish I had the other night was excellent.

I cannot abide manky chips and, sad to say, many local takeaways are not up to scratch.

For a sit down dinner, the Brockley Jack also does a fine Fish and Chip supper, though the kitchen tends to close rather early.

Anonymous said...

To be pedantic, a fish 'supper' is fish and chips, making a 'fish and chip supper' a tautology . Supper is Scottish for 'and chips'.

Please support BC by clicking here when you shop with Amazon

Brockley Central Label Cloud